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Q. Name the four seasons
A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar
The following questions were set in last year’s GCSE examination in England.
These are genuine answers from 16 year olds, not very bright, but entertaining, 16 year olds.
Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink
A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists
Q. How is dew formed
A. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire
Q. What causes the tides in the oceans
A. The tides are a fight between the earth and the moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins the fight.
Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on
A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed
Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections
A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election
Q. What are steroids
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs
Q. What happens to your body as you age
A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental
Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty
A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery
Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
A. Premature death
Q. What is artificial insemination
A. When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow
Q. How can you delay milk turning sour
A. Keep it in the cow
Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorised (e.g. The abdomen)
A. The body is consisted into 3 parts – the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A, E, I, O and U
Q. What is the fibula?
A. A small lie
Q. What is the most common form of birth control
A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium
Q. Give the meaning of the term ‘Caesarean section’
A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome
Q. What is a seizure?
A. A Roman Emperor.
Q. What is a terminal illness
A. When you are sick at the airport.
Q. What does the word ‘benign’ mean?
A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight
Q. What is a turbine?
A. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head
Check this out:- The 32 Most Commonly Misused Words and Phrases
December 13th, 2009 | 
Category: 
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I did this in my GCSES – don't know the answer, but I'll write a bunch of crap so the examiner can get a laugh. I think it worked…
Leaves perspire! Hahaaa that’s so awesome
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by mash able, mashme, Sunny Leone, Glamour Girl, dashmewhat and others. dashmewhat said: http://speedywap.com/20583/ – hilarious exam answers. [...]
And people wonder why the world is going to Hell.
Can someone please start digging my articles for some of the digg traffic? Never had any digg traffic on my site, so guys I will really appreciate if you start digging my posts using the Digg button above or using the Digg button in the chatting bar if you like my posts.
that’s hard to believe
Just thought i would comment and say neat design, did you code it yourself? Looks great.
Yes.
I kud reed theze anshers to kwestuns all da daze long…deese peepul is two smart four me.
Age A, is what you wrote true?
deer azn,
know, eye is nut threw, eye kan rite stuf mor in a day four yu ifn yu knead me two…
luvz & stufs… Age A
As a Newbie, I am always searching online for articles that can help me. You blog reAlly helped me and I will be back soon. Thank you
This might seen unrelated but I just can’t seem to find the pricing options for advertising on your site. How much do you charge per month?
http://buysellads.com/buy/detail/17434
I kind of understand the students, some of these questions are rather retarded.
''Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty''
Lots of shit happens, how can one be sure to write the right answer? Gee.
Hi cheers for an incisive post, I really found your blog by mistake while looking on Goole for something else closely related, in any event before i ramble on too much i would just like to say how much I enjoyed your post, I have bookmarked your site and also taken your RSS feed, Once Again thanks for the blog post keep up the great work.
LMAO
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pic or didn't happen